PSYCHOPATH CHECK LIST Part one

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 In which Julie and I talk about all the craziness 

that goes into dating and even developing a psychopath checklist... 

1:01 PM me: Hey Julie

1:05 PM Julie Cross: Hey! So, I have dating related questions to ask you today

1:06 PM me: Is this in relation to Alex and Eve dating?

1:07 PM Julie Cross: yeah, I just get really stumped when it comes to dating for people that aren't in school together

1:08 PM I'm good with writing high school kids dating and all that...

  but this is different. It's a big world out there. How do you even meet someone as a single person in NYC?

1:11 PM me: lol well I'll start with saying its really tough school is easy because your all together so much and you know everyone's history and their story...When you graduate school you don't have that unit of people anymore you don't have that background so I think there is a tendency (whether its conscience or not I don't know?) Is once people graduate they realize its so hard to find someone so they go back to the people they know from school...That's why you see so many random people getting together that had nothing in common in school they find comfort in the history they had together...

1:12 PM But for everyone else that can't rekindle high school flames I think it's a lot of friends of friends or work people, or just random people you meet at a party/bar/wedding

1:13 PM sorry for the long response lol I just have a lot to say on the topic

1:14 PM Julie Cross: Totally fine! okay, let's go with the bar topic since you brought it up. Say you see Girl A in a bar...first off, what exactly do say to her if you decide to chat with her?

5 minutes

1:20 PM me: Hahaha well I think it starts before you are thinking of what to say usually before I chat with someone there is kind of this locking eye's thing that goes on...You see the person the first time and you kind of lock eyes for a second then turn away...and then later on if you end up locking eyes again you know that your golden....I usually go up and mention something that's relevant to the situation we are in...i.e. if we are at a bar that has live music and they are playing rock music and she looks like shes not into it I would go up and say "This isn't your typical scene huh?"

  Something to that extent...The first line doesn't matter your both looking for an excuse to talk but as the guy you have to break the ice...

1:21 PM not every time I've had girls come up to me and do the same thing...

1:22 PM Julie Cross: but do you have a pre-chat check list, like is there a wedding ring? Signs of psychopathic behavior? Seriously, I would be asking myself the whole time, what if she's a psychopath?!

1:25 PM me: lol I mean it's a risk but I try not to think about it beforehand because that will just make you nervous...So you just kind of go into it blindly and look for red flags if a girl was married I wouldn't want anything to do with it but there is no harm in talking to someone that's married at a bar...It's just talking hitting on someone is a different story...I'm super respectful of people so if I even felt the smallest resistance I would pull back and say I'm out...

5 minutes

1:30 PM Julie Cross: Right. no harm in talking to married people, though I think naturally the happily married women avoid eye contact. At least I do. Not intentionally, but if I'm in a bar without my husband, usually the fact that I'm playing the role of grownup and someone else is playing the role of mom is what's on my mind. I don't even really separate men from women in a room for of strangers. Does that make sense?

1:32 PM me: Yeah exactly that's what I mean if your not into it more than likely people are going to catch that vibe...However, not all the time some guys want a challenge so that fact your not into it will make them go up to you verse someone else...

1:34 PM Julie Cross: There's a 99% chance I wouldn't even notice if someone was attempting to hit on me. I'd just answer their question and move on. The whole process of finding someone like that seems exhausting to me. And scary with psychopaths and all...

1:35 PM me: lol yeah it's super exhausting..,I think that's why so many people turn to online dating because it's so much easier

1:36 PM It's not my thing but a lot of people do it...

  or they meet someone at work or through a friend

1:39 PM Julie Cross: I really do think that you need a IS SHE A PSYCHOPATH check list. For your own safety. Maybe if we make this a blog post, then we can take suggestion in the comment section

1:40 PM me: Maybe I do? I haven't really thought about it...I suppose I need to be prepared...Like an emergency exit plan you have if there is a natural disaster...

 Julie Cross: or an unnatural disaster...

1:42 PM me: hahaha I think that's worse...

  

How do you guys think is the perfect way to meet someone? 
M.P.