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1:51 PM Julie Cross: Since Eve is into Alex, do you think she'll be jealous seeing him all over Elana for the CK shoot and of course during the whole fake relationship? I'm torn with this because part of me thinks she understands but still, understanding and seeing it are very different things...
1:54 PM me: I think jealousy is a tough thing she would probably be jealous seeing it but the question is does she let that manifest itself into something unhealthy...I think no matter how calm you are if you really like someone you are going to be jealous seeing them with another person whether it is for work or not...but you can't let it get to you
1:57 PM Julie Cross: I'm not jealous by nature at all so that emotion often confuses me. When someone is doing better than me or is where I want to be, all of those feelings manifest themselves into my personal drive and then goal of beating myself rather than becoming better than someone else. I don't even think I had any jealous-type boyfriends in my younger days. I had a couple clingy ones though...
1:58 PM have you had a jealous ex?
2:01 PM me: Yeah see that is such a positive way to utilize something that could very easily be negative...
2:02 PM My EX from high school was really jealous especially of all the modeling stuff because that happened later in the relationship...
2:03 PM she just always thought I was cheating on her and I never was and it kind of ruined the relationship I had to keep defending myself for something I never did...
Got exhausting after a while
2:04 PM Julie Cross: I can imagine that it's exhausting dealing with that lack of trust. I guess that's always going to come with the high school relationships.
2:06 PM me: Yeah I think it was just an immaturity thing people can sometimes grow out of it...But in my mind a relationship is about 3 things Love, Respect and Trust without those things why be in a relationship? And if you are too jealous to Trust the person your with than you need to reevaluate the relationship and yourself...
2:07 PM Is it the specific person you don't trust or do you just distrust everyone?
2:08 PM Julie Cross: I think in relation to high school kids, it's so hard to be falling in love for the first time at the height of your insecurity. People are most insecure in the teen years.
2:10 PM But jealously in adult relationships is a whole different ball game.
me: Your totally right...
Yeah like I said most people feel it from time to time and there is nothing wrong with it, it's just how you handle it...
2:11 PM Julie Cross: my method of coping is what came naturally to me, but I do wonder sometimes how much more successful I would be if I let that jealousy drive me to working harder at something.
2:12 PM maybe in a similar sense jealously can get people to admit their feelings for someone else if they haven't done this already
2:16 PM me: yeah I mean it's something that occurs naturally in the body so it can be positive...in that it lets you know how you feel about someone...
but is that a healthy way to know that?
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2:23 PM Julie Cross: I know what you mean....in relation to the Edward Cullen's and Christian Grey's of the world, I cringe at the idea of a guy telling a girl her hated seeing her with someone else and that's what does it for her. I think in relationships, jealousy is the immature response to feelings of extreme like or even love. But the problem occurs when that growth doesn't happen. When the possessive feelings stick around and drive the relationship. There are plenty of girls that get off on that sort of thing. It's empowering to them.
Or they're afraid no one else will feel as strongly.
2:24 PM and I think I've just described Wes Anderson...Eve's ex...lol
2:26 PM me: Yeah and I think that is such an unhealthy way to talk about love...You shouldn't love someone because you hate to see them with other people that's just being possessive...I find Fifty Shades of Grey and Twilight to be more about possessiveness and being domineering than about love...
2:31 PM Julie Cross: totally agree. And it took me awhile to be able to put it into words but Jackson goes through all the stages of love by the end of Tempest...first he's having fun and not wanting to admit he's in love with Holly...he has no reason to put a stamp on them. No urgency. Then when she's shot and he's stuck in 2007, he just wants to be with her, so it's love but it's still a little selfish. Eventually that evolves to him loving her enough to want her to be safe and happy even if that means he can't be with her.
2:35 PM me: Yeah see that makes sense I think that it's natural not to know exactly what you have or what you want I think young people are wishy washy when it comes to love because it's new and it's different and it's mature...But love is all about the two of you together as a unit...and you both have to be happy within that unit and separately you have to be happy with yourself...
2:38 PM Julie Cross: Exactly. I think Alex and Eve have the potential to achieve this.
Do you guys think jealousy has any place in a relationship? Is it always a bad thing?
M.P.
Do you guys think jealousy has any place in a relationship? Is it always a bad thing?
M.P.
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